First walk
Hello. Like everyone at that age, curiosity overpowers reason. Once again, putting on women's clothes and twirling in front of the mirror, I admired my body, and it always ended with a stormy climax, after which came such self-hatred and a promise never to do it again...
But after some time passed, the desire to wear women's clothes would surge again.
Mom worked at the market, and there were many bags of clothes at home. I sometimes helped her and would scout out what was where in advance so I could discreetly take things from those huge sacks.
There were days when mom went out shopping and I stayed home with my stepdad (he didn't care about me, he
was, as usual, drinking with the neighbor until morning in his garage)I was delighted with myself; a very pretty girl looked back at me from the mirror.
After walking around the room in that look, I walked through the whole house and... this desire for something more.
We lived in a private house... The path from the house to the gate, my heart pounding, after a couple of steps I'd listen, take a breath, and then a couple more steps.
The gate was behind me, the road was empty, it was very late, the heels were treacherously clicking and it seemed like the whole city could hear. A little further, cross the bridge and I'm in the park, there's no lighting there and places to hide.
The park was unkempt. And when I saw people, I'd just take a couple of steps into the bushes and wait for them to pass. Then I'd come out of my hiding place, and the sound of heels, the wind playing on my legs, through the blouse you could easily see the bra pleasantly tightening my chest. It was such an excitement that's hard to describe. Gaining a little courage, another group of passersby, and I decided not to hide; they passed by, looking me up and down, and I just bubbled up inside (they looked at me as a girl). That fear of being seen and at the same time such huge excitement that I was seen.
I knew my park perfectly, I knew the places where I shouldn't walk and the places where I loved to spy on couples (who were sure they were alone). There, I realized for myself that I wanted to be not in the guy's place, but to be that girl (once again, from my hiding spot, I watched as a couple, after long kisses, got down to business; he pressed her against a tree, his hands were under her dress, he caressed her, kissed her, she writhed in his hands like a vine, the straps were already off her shoulders, his kisses were all over her body...).
It was hard to see; as I moved closer, the sight I saw simply stunned me. The girl, half-naked, was on her knees and sweetly giving him pleasure, she was just savoring his cock. I froze, understanding I could be noticed, but I couldn't tear myself away from such a movie... After playing around, he put her on all fours, and at the moment he entered her, our eyes met. I saw how she was enjoying it; I wanted to be in her place.) Passing that spot, memories flooded in and I got distracted. A voice pulled me out of my memories:
-Why are you walking alone so late?
It shook me so much that I stopped in a stupor, couldn't utter a word, he asked again, I stayed silent.
It was an adult man, I don't know how old but definitely older than my mom.
-I'm going home (my voice trembled).
-So late?
-I live nearby.
He was lightly dressed and holding a leash in his hands (understanding he was walking a dog, meaning he should be a decent adult, I relaxed a little and, turning in the other direction, quickly walked away. His gaze on my back simply burned.
-Sweetie, hey, wait!
It was like I was scalded with boiling water. And this treacherous stupor, fear shackled my whole body. He stood in the shadow of the trees, and the moonlight only illuminated his legs.
-Come to me.
Fear, what options... Not understanding what I was doing, silently, barely stepping, I approached him.
-Come closer.
One more step and I could feel his breath.
-I've been waiting for you for a while, had enough of your walk?
-Yes.
-Not scared to walk alone in a night park?
-No.
I answered stiffly, while in my thoughts I was debating whether to run or not.
He took a step towards me, put a hand on my shoulder... Ran his fingers along my neck and went a little lower into the opening of the blouse.
-So, what's your name?
-Lera (the first name that came to mind).
-Lera? Or maybe Lyonya? and he laughed loudly.
I stood frozen.
-Lera, you don't want the guys from the yard to know about you, do you?
-No (he wasn't giving other options).
-Good girl.
His hand ran over my breasts, squeezing them, and making sure there was nothing there, he laughed again.
-This will be our secret, don't worry.
With these words, holding me by the shoulder, he silently led me deeper into the park (to an old fountain that had long been overgrown).
-You like being a girl, don't you?
I stayed silent.
-Then be a good girl.
Meanwhile, his hand was already on my waist, it was so hot it just burned my body. It played over me: waist, breasts, butt, went down my leg a little under the skirt, returned to my neck and lips. He carefully caressed my lips with his fingers, parted them, and with his other hand pressed on my shoulders.
I got on my knees, and in front of me, his shorts were already down.
-Lera, be a good girl and no one will find out about this.
That moment when my lips touched his cock. Gently, afraid of hurting him or doing it wrong, afraid of everything in the world. It was like in a fog; now I can't remember every detail. Gently, then rougher, his hands already on the back of my head. My wig was crumpled and fell off me. He completely controlled the whole process. His cock pulsed, tensed, he pushed me deeper into him... I tried to swallow everything as best I could but couldn't, and drops started flowing onto my blouse.
Having satisfied himself, he just pulled up his shorts, saying:
-Good girl, I'll be waiting for you here on Saturday.
I just stayed on my knees until he left. Coming to my senses a little, I looked around. The blouse was ruined. The taste was disgusting. I wanted to wash it away with something, but at the same time, the excitement hadn't gone away. I was scared and ashamed. I found the wig, but it was in the foliage; I didn't put it on. My knees were chafed and dirty. In that state, I carefully made it to the house. It was late, but thankfully my stepdad wasn't home yet.